Parallelism is Relative
by NymboDerp
Summary: Sena and Tsuna are too alike, though really, that could've been attributed to how closely related they were to each other. But have you ever considered a scenario in which Tsuna introduces his cousin to his Guardians? Or one in which Sena introduces his cousin to his strange Amefuto-obsessed friends? Well, you'll find out here! AU, TsuSe are cousins, gen fic. COMPLETE.
1. In which amefuto meets the mafioso

**A/N:** You can't make me believe that Sena and Tsuna aren't related.

Also, Sena's got straying eyes for shy and cute girls. Even if he's more than attached to his Amefuto-men.

Published: 15 Aug 14

Edited: 16 Aug 14

* * *

It was time for their annual family get-together, and Sena honestly wasn't looking forward to it.

He hated having to meet and greet all of his extended family, especially the ones from his father's side. His dad was the second youngest of five children, and he had more than enough cousins (and _their children_, considering how his eldest uncle had three thirty-plus year old children) than he'd ever wanted to deal with. They were all snobby and rude, and they'd only ever stopped putting Sena down after it had been revealed that yes, Sena was _that_ Eyeshield 21, and yes, it wasn't a hoax, here are the videos to prove it!

His mother's side, thankfully, wasn't all that bad. His mother had only had one sister, who had only one child, who was _thankfully_ the same age as him. Nana-oba-san was extremely sweet, and she was the one aunt that Sena loved to meet time and over again—and not to mention, Tsuna, his cousin, was the one person who could empathise with him over how useless they both were.

So when they'd arrived at the restaurant that they were to gather in, Sena had immediately ditched his parents (I want to look for Tsuna-kun, mum!) and searched for his cousin.

"Tsuna-kun! There you are!" He called out in relief when he saw his cousin's familiar, spiky hair. Tsuna's face split into a happy grin, and Sena quickly walked to his side. Greeting him with a tight hug, he finally let go to look his cousin over form head to toe.

He looked… strangely good now. Healthier, and happier. Had something happened to him in the 12 months they'd been apart?

"Ne, Tsuna-kun, you look a lot different… has something good happened to you?" Sena asked with a grin. "Maybe a new girlfriend? Finally got above 80% on your maths test?"

Tsuna laughed, before nudging him lightly. "I was going to ask the same thing to you, Sena!" Giving him a teasing poke in the side, he then said, "But really, I forgot to congratulate you on winning the Christmas Bowl! I was watching the match while it played live…"

Sena let out a contented smile at the thought of the game. The Teikoku Alexanders, while it had been the most physically exhausting game he'd ever played, he'd never felt so good about himself when they'd realised that they had won against the champions of Japan—and Sena had defeated _the original Eyeshield 21_.

"Thank you, Tsuna-kun… I still can't believe that we – the Deimon Devil Bats – managed to do that!" He exclaimed, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. "Well, you know what's been happening in _my_ life… so what's up with you?"

He looked up at Tsuna—realising only then that Tsuna wasn't alone. Blushing in embarrassment, he couldn't help but glance curiously at the people who were surrounding him.

He had quite the collection of boys around him – all of them much taller and strong looking compared to both Tsuna and himself, save for two, who were really just children. Not to mention he had a really cute girl next to him, who was carrying the aforementioned children.

"Well, I've got a whole bunch of friends now!" Tsuna said with a nervous laugh, gesturing at the people behind him. One of them had a scary glower on his face, and the one next to him laughed in a sinister manner—only for the girl to send him a slight frown, making him stop. "I'll introduce you, Sena!"

Sena gave the girl a nervous look – she was _really, really pretty_ – before he nodded. "Alright then…"

Tsuna beamed at him, and slung an arm around Sena's shoulders, pulling him closer to the group. "This is my favourite cousin, Kobayakawa Sena-kun. He's the American footballer I've been showing you guys every so often – the Eyeshield 21 guy?"

"I-it's nice to meet you!" Sena quickly blurted out, managing an awkward bow towards them.

Tsuna grinned, before gesturing with his hand towards a silver-haired man with handsome Eurasian features. Sena couldn't help but wonder if his silver hair was the result of dye, or of premature aging.

"This one's Gokudera Hayato-kun. He's the first of my best friends, and he's sort of like my right hand man," he added with an ironic chuckle. "Forgive him if he's a little loud – he really can be quite a firecracker at times!"

Gokudera didn't seem to mind the teasing, merely greeting Sena with an enthusiastic, "It's great to finally meet the Juudaime's family! I can definitely see the family resemblance between you two!"

"Now this big guy's Yamamoto Takeshi-kun. He's a baseball player, but he's also the best kendo-master I've met so far," Tsuna continued, patting Yamamoto on the bicep—probably because that was the easiest part of him that Tsuna could reach. He really was tall, but not as tall as Kakei—thank God. "He's really nice, and I'm sure you two will get along!"

Sena gave Yamamoto another bow, giving him a nervous smile.

Yamamoto laughed boisterously. "You don't need to be so polite, Sena-kun! You don't mind me calling you that, right?" He asked, even as Sena nodded quickly. "My dad runs an amazing sushi bar in Tokyo, so come over whenever you want. I'll be sure to ask him to give you some free service!" He added, his grin putting Sena at ease.

Wide-eyed, Sena couldn't help but wonder if Yamamoto was the big brother-figure that Sena and Tsuna never had.

Tsuna smiled in relief when it seemed that Sena was taking to his friends, quickly introducing him to Hibari-kun and Mukuro-kun in turn, making their introductions brief in case they ended up chasing his cousin away. He knew that Hibari and Mukuro could be scary even on the best of days.

Hibari sniffed contemptuously at Sena, obviously dismissing him as a threat, while Mukuro kept his heterochromatic eyes fixed on his cousin, almost as if he were prey.

Tsuna narrowed his eyes slightly, shaking his head decisively. Mukuro was not to touch his cousin at all!

There was a moment where the boy and his friend stared at each other with such intensity that it caused everyone to take a step back, unwilling to get involved in the silent war between them.

Finally, Mukuro looked away with a soft "fuu…"

Tsuna smiled triumphantly at his victory, before turning to the next of his Guardians. However, he wasn't fast enough to stop the white-haired boy from talking first.

"I am EXTREMELY happy to meet you, Tsuna's cousin!" Ryohei yelled boisterously, stepping forward with a wide grin on his face. "I'm Sasagawa Ryohei - but you can EXTREMELY call me nii-san!"

Sena's eyes widened a second time, and he couldn't help but wonder if Ryohei was the big brother-figure that Sena and Tsuna never wished they had.

"S-sure...?" Sena responded after a moment's respite, though he still looked rather shell-shocked by Ryohei's rather _explosive_ introduction.

Tsuna laughed nervously, taking hold of Sena's arm to capture his attention again. "Now, Sena, this is Dokuro Chrome-san. She's holding onto Reborn and Bovino Lambo-kun," he introduced, gesturing at each of them in turn.

Though Sena's eyes were fixed upon Chrome and her pretty face, he could see that Reborn looked around 8 years of age and was by Chrome's side, holding her hand rather sedately. Lambo, however, was squirming in Chrome's other arm, trying to break free to wreak havoc.

"N-nice to meet you, Sena-kun… Tsuna-kun has told us a lot about you," Chrome greeted in a voice that was just as pretty as her face, and that made Sena blush furiously. He'd never been so _captivated_ by such a pretty girl, and the fact that she was _talking to him_, willingly too…!

"I- I hope it wasn't anything too bad," Sena stammered out after a moment's silence, all too aware of Tsuna's amusement.

"Let Lambo-san go! Lambo-san wants to eat _now!_" The child in Chrome's arm cried out, struggling to escape. Tsuna quickly grabbed him, holding him carefully.

"Not right now, Lambo-kun! Dinner's not served yet!" He chided the child, too distracted to stop Reborn from letting go of Chrome's hand to tug at Sena's shirt.

"Chaos," Reborn greeted, his eyes – too sharp for a child – piercing into Sena. He seemed to be looking down at Sena, despite his much-shorter stature. "You look just as _Dame_ as Tsuna."

Sena's jaw dropped at his words, spluttering as he tried to find a way to retaliate without offending the child—or making him seem like a bad person in Chrome's eyes. "H-hey… isn't that a bit harsh?" He asked, trying not to pout at the judgement. "I'm not _dame_… not anymore!"

Reborn looked at him from head to toe, making Sena squirm in embarrassment. He then smirked. "Tch… at least you're less scrawny than Tsuna. Want to play a game with me?" He added suddenly.

The non sequitur made Sena blink, looking confused. "S-sure? What's the game called?" He asked.

Reborn's smirk widened into an evil grin, sending shivers down Sena's spine. Oh god… what had he agreed to?

"It's called the _mafia game_—"

Tsuna nervously put himself between Reborn and Sena before Reborn could say anymore. "_Well_, Sena, you've met all of my best of friends!" He exclaimed, letting Chrome take Lambo out of his arms so that he could begin to push Sena away from his friends. "I suppose you can call them my _family_, now, because of how close we are…"

Sena could tell that Tsuna was trying distract him from Reborn's creepy behaviour, and he was rather thankful that his cousin was giving him an escape route. The kid, though young, was someone he didn't want to cross at all.

He had this feeling that Reborn was more trouble than he looked.

But he couldn't help but wonder, was that how Hiruma or Agon were as children? Creepy and overly precocious? He shuddered again at the thought of the baby-devils that his mind conjured up as an image. Hiruma would've been a child that even his own mother would fear...

But he quickly shook himself of these thoughts.

"Is that why you brought them over?" Sena asked, looking over his shoulder to glance at Chrome one last time—only she was now under the protective embrace of Mukuro. Were they siblings? he wondered, noting the similarities they had between them.

They both had purple-black hair, with one eye that was different to the other (Chrome had a rather fetching eye-patch, and he couldn't help but wonder what had happened to the girl), and though Chrome was a lot more timid than Mukuro… they seemed to exude the same mysterious air. Not to mention, they were both very attractive…

But Sena's thoughts were quickly interrupted by Tsuna's voice, and he turned to look at him again.

"Y-yeah… I suppose you can say that," Tsuna agreed. Sending him another grin, he nudged Sena lightly. "Say, why don't you introduce me to _your_ American football friends? It isn't fair that you get to meet my friends, while I haven't met yours!"

Sena's lips curled into a nervous smile, unable to _not_ agree when faced with Tsuna's expectant doe-eyes. "A-alright…" he mumbled in defeat, wondering just how long it would take before Hiruma chased Tsuna away in fear.

Tsuna beamed once again, before giving him a tight hug. "Why don't you grab a table with your parents? I'll get my mum and the rest of my friends to join you guys – we can finally have a table for ourselves!" He exclaimed, looking rather cheerful at the thought.

Sena couldn't help but agree. At least this year, they wouldn't have to put up with snobby family members looking down at both Tsuna and Sena…

And if Tsuna somehow got Chrome-san to sit next to him, that made the slight victory all the sweeter.

* * *

**A/N:** I like to think that Sena gets infatuated with girls who have similar personalities to his own, such as Karin. But in the end, he's the kind of guy that needs someone who's confident enough to make sure that Sena knows that he's worth it too.

So that's why Amefuto players are so much better for him (though really, Sena and Hibari are hilarious couple to consider), rather than Chrome. (But don't get me wrong: I love her to bits!)


	2. In which the mafioso meets amefuto

**A/N:** This took a very long time to write. I actually couldn't bring myself to finish this until I got this one PM, just around 21 hours ago from this pretty chill chap about when I'd update this.

And then I added around 1k, of pure and utter crack. Time for me to get back to my studies and procrastination!

Posted: 14 Dec 14

Edited: 15 Dec 14

* * *

They had arranged to meet up a week later, at Yamamoto's dad's sushi bar… and though Sena had thought to invite _only_ the Deimon Devil Bats, it had somehow spiraled out from there.

Sweating nervously, Sena could see rather prominent football players from _every team that they'd played against and with_ crowding the rather small space within the restaurant.

Shin-kun was there, as was Maruko-san, and Kisaragi. They were all sitting together quietly doing—_something_, while beside them, Taki and Suzuna and Mizumachi were causing a loud ruckus. Kisaragi was obviously annoyed by the noises, though Shin and Maruko seemed unaffected.

In fact, they seemed to be actively disregarding the three louder ones, nudging their empty mugs around and discussing something that was… about football plays?

Shin suddenly smashed his mug against Maruko's with a surprisingly passionate look in his eye, and by the revelation in Maruko's eyes, Sena was fairly sure that he was going to experience something along those lines the next time he was on the field with the White Knights or the Dinosaurs. (And wasn't that such a _nice feeling?_)

He turned his eye onto the next table, where Sakuraba and Takami were chatting with Akaba and Juri. They seemed to be fairly amiable, and rather decidedly _not_ talking about potentially smashing Sena to bits on the field. They were being… friendly. And not football-oriented.

And _wow_, Sena actually found himself surprised by that: did they even have any interests outside of football? Sena knew that he himself didn't have much time to dedicate to other interests.

Close by to Akaba and Juri, Koutarou was trying to pick a fight with Musashi—who was as chill as he usually was, looking fairly bored by Koutarou's attempts to goad him into a match.

Sena sent a silent prayer for Musashi's patience. Koutarou, while a pretty cool guy, could be… voracious (_was that the proper word to use?_) at his worst.

Yamato, Karin-chan and Taka were already seated beside a rather awe-struck Ikkyu and Monta, the former three conversing rather idly about something or another, while Kid and Tetsuma were moving to join them.

Karin-chan sipped delicately at her tea, listening placidly to what Yamato was saying, saying something in response that Kid drawled something that made her cheeks light up a bright red.

Yamato seemed to laugh, but the evil grin that appeared on his face made Sena look away quickly—

And there, by the wall, Riku was looking angrily (up) at Kakei and his two 'disciples', who were all standing next to him, seemingly oblivious to Riku's anger at how tall they were. Instead, they were more concentrated on how Unsui was trying to pull Chuubou away from Gaou and Agon, who were having a stare-off of sorts.

And nearby the tense staring match, Jyuumonji, Togano, and Kuroki were all huddled around a table discussing something, and nearby then, Marco was looking rather devious as he eavesdropped on them.

Hell, even Panther was there for some reason, chatting one-sidedly to a tired-looking Yuki-san, and Clifford from the American team – for reasons that he didn't want to know – was picking a fight with Hiruma! Kurita was beside Hiruma as usual, and was already eating a lot of sushi with Komusubi-kun.

Yamamoto's father was cheerfully serving them dish after dish, chatting rather amiably with Kurita as they gorged on his (admittedly delicious looking) sushi.

_Hopefully, Tsuna wouldn't be too mad that it wasn't just the Devil Bats that were there…_

Sena sighed, turning mournful eyes towards the door. And also hopefully, he had enough money to pay for this… (He doubted it. Hopefully, some people would be nice enough to pay for their own meals…)

* * *

"Sena!"

His head snapped up when he heard Tsuna call out for him, and a relieved grin spread across his features, quickly moving to pull his cousin into a hug.

While he really _was_ grateful that Tsuna was now here to save him from the rest of the football players behind him, it was also a tradition that the two cousins upheld every time they met.

It had first started as a reassurance that yes, they were together again, and they were still perfectly healthy and safe—especially with how they'd endured years of being bullied.

Thankfully, neither of them were subject to repeated and outright bullying. (At least, not to Sena's knowledge.)

But apparently, most people weren't used to the sight of two boys, closely related, to be so physically affectionate.

Sena could feel his back prickling with the stares of multiple people, and he stiffened up. He could also hear a dip in the murmurs behind him. Were they all watching Sena and his cousin embrace…?

"Who the fuck is that, pipsqueak?" Hiruma called out, making Sena stiffen up even more and he quickly pulled away from Tsuna to face Hiruma.

Beside him, Clifford looked extremely… well, _devious_, putting Sena further on edge, but he could also see that yes, everyone _was_ watching him.

"T-this is my cousin, Sawada Tsunayoshi…" Sena introduced rather hesitantly, presenting his cousin to the group of men (and three women). "He wanted to meet all of you, so uh…" He trailed off nervously, watching as Hiruma's eyes flickered between the two.

For a moment, Hiruma looked surprised when he look at Tsuna's face—which surprised Sena, considering how tightly Hiruma guarded his expressions: he'd all but reinvented the poker face, after all.

Hiruma suddenly cackled, looking all too amused. "You don't know about your cousin's _extracurricular activities_, do you?" He asked Sena, resting the muzzle of his gun against his shoulder.

Tsuna stiffened up imperceptibly at the question and the sight of his gun, but Sena knew him too well to not notice. Sending his cousin a strange look, he shook his head.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Hiruma-senpai." Sena replied, turning to look rather reproachfully at his upperclassman. "And I think Tsuna-kun's more than capable enough to tell me if he wants to! Right, Tsuna?" He asked, looking at Tsuna for confirmation.

Tsuna merely smiled in response, looking rather nervous. Sena took that as an affirmation, turning to look at Hiruma rather defensively.

"I-I'm more worried about the fact that your _senpai_ has a gun…" Tsuna whispered to Sena. Hiruma reminded him all too much of Reborn, who had strong-armed him into doing things with his own guns. Was this Hiruma-senpai doing the same to his cousin? He'd have to do something bad to Hiruma if that was the case: no one messed with his Famiglia, both blood-related or not…

Despite the meek persona he displayed to Sena, the fire lighting up in his eyes made it all too clear that Tsuna wouldn't be a pushover—even for Hiruma. He'd survived Reborn's training, after all, and not only the Varia, but the Millefiore too. Hiruma was nothing.

Hiruma's ears seemed to twitch, and Sena narrowed his eyes at the widening grin. Hiruma didn't comment on Sena's suspicion, looking amused at his obliviousness to what was occurring between Tsuna and him. Tsuna's attempts at a power play were all too funny because of how soft his features were, but nevertheless, Hiruma stayed his distance.

No matter how soft Tsuna looked, he was still the (soon to be) Tenth head of the Vongola Famiglia, and that was a power that Hiruma wasn't going to awaken and anger. Rather, it would be more prudent for him to keep Tsuna on his side—at least, until he was sure that he could neutralise any possible threats from his part.

"You don't need to worry about any fucking gun," Hiruma stated, much to the shock of Kurita, who choked on a sushi. (Hiruma being nice? What was the world coming to?!) "Why don't you introduce your cousin for us all, fucking pipsqueak?"

Though Hiruma had phrased it like one, it wasn't a suggestion. The imperative was thinly, if at all, veiled.

Sena glanced nervously at Hiruma, before clearing his throat rather timidly in an attempt to silence the noise and capture everyone's attention.

Unsurprisingly, there was no response, making Hiruma roll his eyes.

The blond aimed his gun at the ceiling, and he fired a shot, making Sena cry out in alarm. This was Yamamoto-kun's store! He couldn't just damage it at his own whim! And didn't he say that he didn't have to worry about "any fucking gun"?!

However, he hadn't realised that it was only a blank, and that his yelp had caused everyone's eyes to rivet onto Sena. The realisation made him flinch, especially when he noticed the pressure of everyone's stares. Especially because of the rather amused grin on Juri's face at his (decidedly _un_feminine, thank you very much) yelp.

Flushing heavily at the questioning looks on everyone's faces, he repressed the urge to hide behind Tsuna.

Even if he hadn't expected this gathering to explode in numbers at an exponential rate, he had to deal with it. If only because he knew Hiruma's gun was pointed at him right at that very moment.

* * *

"T-this is my cousin, Sawada Tsuna-kun… he wanted to meet the Devil Bats, but uh… I'm glad that everyone else came to meet him too," Sena mumbled in self-consciousness.

Tsuna stepped forward, a look of slight nervousness on his face as everyone's eyes moved from Sena onto his cousin.

"It's nice to meet everyone! Thanks for taking care of my cousin," he said in greeting, his words confident despite the wariness in his stance.

Sena couldn't help but feel a flash of pride going through him at the sight of his cousin's obvious change.

Just last year, Tsuna wouldn't have been able to introduce himself with such self-confidence. But then again, neither could Sena… maybe the two of them really had changed.

There was a general mumble throughout the crowd, and one by one, they came up to introduce themselves to Tsuna, much to Sena's relief. Sure, quite a few of them were intimidating with their height (Kakei) or build (Shin), and even Sena couldn't believe that he had become friends with them (_Akaba_). And then there were the people who he was still _utterly terrified of_, who, for some reason that he couldn't comprehend, was actually being his 'charming' self (Agon).

Everything seemed to be going really well, all things considering!

But really, Sena should've realised that when things went smoothly and good in his life… Well, what goes up must come down, as Mamori-nee-chan would say.

While Sena was explaining to Tsuna that yes, _tight end _was a thing in American football, and _no_, it was not anything suspicious so could you stop grinning like that whenever you look at Taki-kun, the man currently discussed suddenly grabbed everyone's attention.

"Mafia game? That sounds pretty fun!" Taki all but yelled from his corner of the room, striking a rather admirable and impressive pose in front of an all-too-familiar child.

(_No, it really _was_ admirable—how does one get their leg around their own neck like _that_?!_)

"It is pretty fun… You know how to play Russian Roulette? I have a gun ready right here." Reborn chirped, his innocent and childish voice sounding oddly demonic in its purity. "You could try it out—and it's heavy, so you might want to watch out."

At the sound of sudden laughing erupting from a certain, google-wearing teenager, Tsuna and Sena paled at the same time. But for different reasons.

Sena was worried that Taki might infect the poor, overly precocious kid with his idiocy, or hurt someone with the gun—but Tsuna was much more worried than that. From what he'd been able to see, Taki didn't have any regrets.

And the first time a Dying Will Bullet was used, it would kill those who didn't have any regrets.

Tsuna was about to intercept and prevent Reborn from doing something _stupid_ (it had to be the onset of puberty!) when another voice rang out.

"That gun? Looks like you got it off a rack from the secondhand shop for 50 fucking yen. Might as well use _this_." Hiruma triumphantly set down a handgun in front of Taki—who actually _picked it up._

Sena let out a strangled sound, now _very_ worried. Quickly rushing over to grab the gun before Taki could actually fire it, he somehow managed to _trip over and land face first into Maruko's own face._

Oh.

God.

His face burning a bright red, he scrambled away from the astonished girl. Any thought related to the gun was forgotten as he tried to scramble for apologies, flinching back when he saw Marco's blank expression from over Maruko's shoulder.

"I- I'm sorry!" Sena squeaked out over and over again, bowing repeatedly towards Maruko—and quickly _running away_ to hide behind Tsuna. Who seemed to be torn between outright laughing, looking stern, and being utterly confused.

_Oh god._

_Why couldn't it have been C-Chrome-chan sitting there?_

Oblivious to what was happening on the other side of Tsuna's surprisingly broad (and, most importantly, _safe_) barrier of a body, Sena sank into all different shades of red due to mortification of both his action and the direction his thoughts were heading.

Tsuna, however, was more than aware of what was happening. Pinning Reborn with a sharp look, making his former tutor grin unabashedly, pocketing the gun, he then narrowed his eyes on Hiruma. The three of them ignored the burst of distracted, half-worried and half-amused whispers that erupted around them.

The blond in question was completely unrepentant, not even making a move to remove the gun from Taki—who was now looking down into the barrel of the gun with one eye closed and his tongue between his teeth.

There was a sharp intake of breath throughout the room.

Everyone was silent, eyes flickering between the drama between Sena and Maruko, and the gun in Taki's hand. Well, everyone apart from Unsui, who had a hand clapped over Agon's mouth with a wince on his face; his twin was probably biting down on the fleshy part of his hand.

No one made a move to remove the gun from Taki, not when there was the _high risk of Taki blowing his eyeball out of his own skull_.

Tsuna really had to wonder what exactly possessed this idiot to do such a stupid act.

"It is actually loaded!" Taki exclaimed finally, pushing it away from him with a sudden jerk of his hand, much to the relief of Tsuna. Until he realised what he had done next—making it _fire because he hadn't removed his finger from the trigger._

Unsurprisingly, there was a very loud bang that resounded throughout the room.

Tsuna yelped instinctively, ducking at the sound of the bang thanks to the tugging at his Intuition. He made sure to drag Sena down with him ("W-wha-?!"), unwilling to chance having his cousin being hit by one of those damned Dying Will bullets. (Though he had to wonder - how had Hiruma gotten his hands on a Dying Will bullet?)

_(Thank God for his intuition confirming that fact: if someone had actually gotten hit with a _real_ bullet..._)

Other members, however, weren't so lucky to have Tsuna's forewarning.

* * *

Reborn actually _laughed_ as extremely masculine and hardened athletes screamed/yelped/wailed loudly in response to the gunshot. One very tall teenager in particular (Kakei, he recalled offhandedly) had managed to hit a _very_ high pitch.

The whole scene, from the time when Reborn prepositioned Taki with a Mafia Game to the time Tsuna had dragged Sena down, lasted only twenty seconds.

Twenty seconds was all it took for complete and utter fucking _Armageddon_ to occur.

* * *

Koutarou burst with all the Righteous Flames of Challenge, his clothes shredding to just his boxer briefs ("Oh god—_it's neon pink football-print._") as he grabbed Musashi, pressing their faces right next to each other as he yelled out his challenge for all to hear.

Flames were burning on his forehead, and scraps of his clothing floated down around him like snow from the sky on a cold winter's day. Takami didn't seem to be particularly happy about having neon pink briefs being thrust into his face, and on closer inspection, neither did Juri or Sakuraba.

Mizumachi ripped his clothing off to copy Koutarou, and grabbed Kakei and yelled out his own challenge ("I'LL SHOW YOU HOW MUCH COOLER I AM THAN YOU, KAKEI-CHAN."), before jumping onto the table where Kurita and Komusubi were eating—scattering their food and having it land _everywhere_.

Including Akaba's guitar. And Shin's face. And onto everyone's hair and clothing_ and oh god, Sena was pretty sure that Kisaragi's entire body was covered in still-writing octopus legs and vinegar and if that wasn't a look of pure and utter disgust/rage, then Sena was a girl with a third boob._

Tsuna and Sena paled simultaneously. Anger, palpitating and almost a solid substance that permeated the air itself, suddenly welled up and burst out in an impressive show of pent up teenaged fury.

Let it be said that American footballers, all of whom had years of physical training and emotional trauma due to hardcore losses and matches, should not be faced off in a no-bars, no-rules brawl.

The two cousins looked at each other, in the eye of the storm beside a demonically grinning duo from Hell (damn you, Reborn and Hiruma!), with teary eyes.

_"Why does this always happen to me?!"_ They both wailed.

* * *

It wasn't until a week later that either of the cousins realised that Hiruma and Reborn had taken the opportunity to swap training techniques and arrange for _exchange_ _sessions_.

Sena rather appropriately appropriated very apt vernacular from a certain captain.

_Fuck._

* * *

_FIN_

* * *

**A/N:** Can you tell when I just gave up because I lost my plot bunnies? This is the last installment of my cracktastic venture into the mashing of ES21 and KHR, two of my favourite manganime fandoms.

(But admittedly, one thing I seriously would like to see is Hibari or Chrome dating Sena. And them having to go through some kind of initiation trial à la American Football Style)

EDIT: I'm thinking of branching this out into a bunch of stupid one-shots. But I dunno.


End file.
